This month has been full of some ups and downs. It can definitely be overwhelming at times. I think about what I've gone through this month/year and it seems.... I don't know, not fair or just too much. For the most part I've been able to handle everything that's come but sometimes I just want to through my hands up and say 'I GIVE UP! YOU WIN!!' It's hard to explain sometimes just how difficult things can be. I think some people just think of the obvious, she can't walk and can't feel. But there's SOOO much more then that. Because I can't feel so much but my body can, it tries to send me signs to let me know something's off. These "signs" come in the form of headaches, cold and hot flashes, depression, anxiety, leg and back spasms, bladder issues. Just a few days ago I was going through withdrawals. I didn't know that was what was wrong, so my body just goes through all these signs for 2 days and it's a total guessing game. I never had depression or anxiety before the accident. And luckily I don't get it that often now, but for me I think anxiety is the worst feeling in the world (that and a broken heart). I wouldn't wish those feelings on anyone. It took 2 days and a call to a doctor and the co-founder at Neuroworx, Dale, to figure out that it was a withdrawal to a non-narcotic pain med. I hate thinking my body is depending that much on them but right now I guess it's just going to have to be that way. Dale helped explain it to me so that it made sense. Please know I'm not sharing this story for pity. I just feel that sometimes people may not realize just how difficult this can be for somebody in my situation.
Enough complaining! I've also had some great experiences this month. As I shared in the last update, Ben and myself were getting ready to go to the step-a-thon at Neuroworx. It was a lot of fun. I actually made the whole 3 hours and Ben did great! It was great to see everyone out there volunteering their time and bodies for the cause.
Enough complaining! I've also had some great experiences this month. As I shared in the last update, Ben and myself were getting ready to go to the step-a-thon at Neuroworx. It was a lot of fun. I actually made the whole 3 hours and Ben did great! It was great to see everyone out there volunteering their time and bodies for the cause.
My nephew Mytchell was able to come stay with me for a couple of days which was great! The first day Ben was here and they went and ran a couple errands together. It's funny to see them hang out. Ben's not much of a kid person, so now that Mytchell is a little older, Ben doesn't mind him hanging out. The other 2 days he was here Ben had to travel so it was just the 2 of us. Mytchell had an awesome idea to try the diet coke and mentos challenge. So with the help of out awesome neighbors, Heather and Quinn, they got the stuff from the gas station. That was something I couldn't miss getting on camera. That's one of the pluses to this. With not being able to work right now, I've had a lot of time to hang out with my nieces and nephews. A week or so ago my mom took the nieces and nephews and had a sleepover there. I went to hang out with them after therapy one day. It was a lot of fun. We roasted marshmallows and played some games.
My birthday was last Saturday, too, and it was so great! I actually talked Ben into getting a pedicure with me. It's the first one I've had since the accident and Ben's first (and probably last) one as well. I told him to invite a friend of his too so he wouldn't be the only boy. It was a blast! We got there and after talking to the boys they said they would do it but only if it was a girl doing it for them, ha ha. As requested, I made sure that happened and I also made sure to get some great pics. We went to Training Table after and it was delicious! After getting home for about an hour, friends starting walking in the door. Ben put together a little surprise BBQ for me. It was a great night and I'm so grateful to everyone that came. It was such a fun night! I'm getting old and I showed that night, by midnight I called it quits. 5 years ago, the party would have just been getting started. But hey, that's part of life I guess.
This Sunday is Ben's birthday. Last year I threw him a big 30th party so this year I told him we could do whatever he wanted. I'm not really planning anything which might sound lame but it's exactly what he wants, so that's what he's getting.
Last I want to throw this out. With the school year starting, myself and a few others are going to start going to schools again and speaking with middle and high school kids. If you have students around here and think their schools would be interested, please contact me so I can go to the schools and get in touch with them. I think it can be so beneficial for younger people to hear our stories and hopefully take something away from them in a positive way. This is something I've always wanted to do, even before the accident. So please don't hesitate to contact me with school info.
Thanks guys and until next time, love you all! I hope everyone's having an awesome summer!
Last I want to throw this out. With the school year starting, myself and a few others are going to start going to schools again and speaking with middle and high school kids. If you have students around here and think their schools would be interested, please contact me so I can go to the schools and get in touch with them. I think it can be so beneficial for younger people to hear our stories and hopefully take something away from them in a positive way. This is something I've always wanted to do, even before the accident. So please don't hesitate to contact me with school info.
Thanks guys and until next time, love you all! I hope everyone's having an awesome summer!